Boy has it been a busy start to the new year for the Shorties!
We finally made it back to Brissy only to be faced with the worst floods in decades. Work was cancelled, supermarkets went into meltdown as people stocked up on groceries like the Apocalypse was on its way and everyone was housebound tentatively glued to their tv screens watching the 24 hour news coverage. Luckily our friends in Windsor adopted us so we weren’t alone in our time of need- there was no fear of our second floor apartment being flooded but it was very likely that power to that area would be cut so we headed for the hills! Now as we approach the end of January, week one of work is nearly finished for Anna in her new analyst job and Siobhan in her new super fancy PR role.
As Siobhan mentioned in the last blogpost we were temporarily separated for the New Year celebrations so Anna and Roisin have finally gotten themselves together to bring you the second half of the Shorties new years antics. So here goes……After four sunny days in Airlie Beach (pics will follow in later post) the rain clouds started to gather as we turned on the radio to hear the news of the devastating floods in Rockhampton. Rockhampton is a major town right smack bang on the Bruce Highway which is the main road leading down to Brisbane and linking all of the major towns along the East Coast.
Rain Clouds Descend on Airlie Beach
Unfortunately Kate had to be back to work early on Tuesday morning so it was just Roisin and Anna that set out to find a road back to Brisbane on Sunday afternoon. When it came to the trip home we ventured on an unplanned journey through the Outback travelling a grand total of 2473km’s over four long/hot/sweaty/smelly/laughter filled/ noisy days (Anna and Roisin in one small car for four days do you need to even question the choice of adjectives!). 
We had no plan except to avoid Rockhampton at all costs as it was due to be completely closed off for at least ten days. We stopped off at far too many places to include all of them so here are just a few of the more memorable ones which have been prepared with the assistance of Roisin and her copybook full of notes.
Airlie Beach to Clermont “The Town that Moved”
639km
We rocked up to Clermont only to discover that all the residents were…. DEAD!!!! Dum dum dum!!!! We suspected that they might have all died in the floods of 1916 (which is why it is known as the town that moved) but the unfriendly lady in the local motel informed us that Clermont was actually a mining town- as if that explained all the ghosts and the ridiculous price that she was charging to stay a night in her empty motel. It was at that point that we strolled down the road and discovered the idiosyncrasy of Australian Outback Hotels which are basically pubs with a few (rarely used) guest rooms randomly located upstairs for a price that our budget could afford.
Classy Establishment (check out Grinders nightclub on the side...super classy!)
The lady at reception informed us that the pub was built in 1864 and we suspected that she may have had a hand in building it…. she apologised as we went up the creaky stairs to the loo which looked like it hadn’t been used since the turn of the century and we don’t mean the millennium.
Yes they are dead flies! Lucky we brought our own stash of toilet paper!
After figuring out the air con and re-wiring the TV, we cozied up in our beds and watched back to back episodes of CSI Miami which prompted Anna to seek a defence weapon in case the ghosts attacked in the middle of the night- in the end she had to make do with a can of mosquito spray- an obvious choice to repel potential murderers. Just as we were about to dose off, Roisin decided it would be a perfect time to revisit the prehistoric toilets so we wandered down the creaky hallway arm in arm fearing for our lives. Our fears were realized when out of the shadows stalked the creepy old man (ghost) who had served us dinner that evening- Roisin screamed and ran into the toilet leaving Anna in the pitch black room with the creepy man (ghost) who proceeded to wander round the perimeter of the dark room looking in every corner with a only a cigarette lighter to guide him, as if Anna wasn’t even there- then as Roisin emerged from the bathroom he drifted away into the darkness leaving us to wander back to our beds for a completely sleepless night.
Making our escape at 4.30am before the ghosts woke up
On the never ending road into the Outback we traveled through some lovely countryside
And more countryside……
We got super excited when we saw mining stock piles
Karen (the satnav) had one of many freak attacks when she couldn’t find the road
And we saw some more lovely countryside.…
Emerald to Springsure to Rolleston and Back Again
587km
We arrived at Emerald at 8am to a scene of devastation. At this point in the Queensland flooding saga it had been one of the worst hit towns with acres of farmland and retail outlets completely destroyed. The road into town was totally impassible so a very kind local man offered to show us through the irrigation systems and farms on a back route which led into the town centre.
Railings mangled by the flood waters
We had been in constant contact with Mike and Kate back at base to find out the best routes to bring us safely to Brisbane and Roisin was kept busy with her map, newspaper and copybook trying to calculate all the distances on the oz maps which never EVER come with a scale so really it is anybodies guess how far away anything is!
Welcome to my Office
After our super early start we had to wait in Emerald until 9am to cross the bridge that led out of the town. If successful this route would put us on a “short cut” to Rolleston which would then lead us down to Roma and get us back to Brisbane within the day. Sorted!
Water levels receded enough to allow us to pass over the bridge
Once we crossed the bridge we really began to see the damage that the floods had caused to the roads. Outside Springsure we got these pictures.
Sections of road swept away by floodwaters
Anna on a chunk of road that washed into the field
The bridge over the creek washed away
Whole portion of road and bridge swept away by flood
We won't be getting through that Road
138km down the road – 1km away from our first landmark destination- we came to an impasse where the road was completely flooded as far as the eye could see (as per pic above) so we had to turn back and retrace our tracks to Emerald. On our way back in the little town of Springsure we stopped into the petrol station and Roisin was delighted when the owner showed us two little kangaroo joeys which had been rescued by passers by after their mothers had been killed on the road (kangaroos being knocked down by cars is quite a common occurrence in Australia- motorists are asked to stop and check marsupial pouches i.e. kangaroos and koalas to see if the joey is still alive in the mothers pouch and take it to the nearest vet).
Roisin meets her first live kangaroo
After we had seen the kangaroos the very kind owners offered us the use of their shower to freshen up in and we gladly accepted delighted to feel fresh for a change!
Once we got back to Emerald we consulted Mike and Kate- our Brisbane based navigators, Roisin got out the maps and sourced some extra strong coffee as we realized that the only way to get around the floods was to take a 900km detour right into the heart of the Outback.
Our Journey to the Outback- the green spots are some of the places we stopped or stayed in along the way
The funds were starting to run low but we decided that if we were to make the trip, music was essential (there is rarely any radio reception or phone signal in the Outback) so we used some of our dwindling savings to stock up our food supplies and purchased a four disc cd which is possibly one of the only reasons we managed to stay sane over the following few days! We now know all the words to Ice Ice Baby and Gangsta’s Paradise (provided 3 solid hours entertainment).
Stocking up before we hit the road
Barcaldine “The Town that was Rebuilt” to Blackall
107km
After our debacle in Emerald we headed a further 309km west before we stopped in for the night at Barcaldine ( a relatively biggish town in Outback terms) we still had no phone reception so we set out to find a pay phone to call our navigators and let our families know we were still alive- tip: if you are planning a trip to the Outback buy a Telstra phone card because many pay-phones no longer accept cash payment they only take cards- absolute pain when you’re stuck in the middle of nowhere with no phone and somehow seems like false advertising surely the name should be self explanatory they are pay-phones after all not Telstra-Card-Phones….. so as you can probably tell from this little rant the mood at this stage of our trip was going down hill fast. We were tired and a little worse for wear so we consulted the Barcaldine Tree of Knowledge for advice.
Roisin juicing the Tree of Knowledge in Barcaldine
We went for food at the local tavern before heading to find a motel for the night. The motel was the best yet (no dead people in sight) and we decided it was high time we had a sleep in and recharged our batteries a little bit before setting off on the longest emptiest stretch of our journey.
Dinner in the Witches Kitchen
This time we decided to do the responsible thing and drop into the local police station before we hit the road just to make sure the roads were clear. We met some small little children on bikes (The Angel Children as we like to call them) who directed us to the cutest police station you ever did see -unfortunately it was still closed for the holidays- we must have looked pretty pitiful at this stage because when we dropped into the government office next door there was an amazing man (or God-man as we like to call him) at the desk who looked up all the information we needed and even called the Roma
"Start Ya Bastard" Australian Engine Spray
Police to see if these two Irish lasses would ever make it through to Brisbane and amazingly the answer was YES- best news we had in days!
After breakfast in the local petrol station we set of refreshed and with a newspaper full of trivia to keep us entertained on the 595km drive to Roma. It was day three of our adventure and we were moving onto the barrenest stretch of road we had experienced with very few towns and no prospect of phone reception until we reached our destination.
Blackall to Roma
488km
When we arrived at the next big town- Blackall- we were glad of the break.
We're Definitely in the Outback Now
Our Honorary Shortie
We felt a little at home out there in those isolated towns. Everyone was up for a bit of banter when we stopped in and every passing car gave us a wave. By the time we reached Roma we were like two feral people as we starred in amazement at the first traffic lights we had seen in days.
Two of our new buddies
The end was in sight with only 475km to Brisbane so we dropped into a local motel where we were once again informed that motels in the Outback don’t come in our price range (seeing a pattern here) but they recommended a hostel in the town centre called Irish McGann’s which was perfectly located over the local Irish bar.
McGanns got there letters a little mixed up...
As soon as we walked in the door we were all go, like two gerbils let out of a cage. There was a lovely crowd of Roma Police Officers and Firemen perched up at the bar so we zoned in on them and told them all the tales of our travels, talking a mile a minute delighted to finally have an audience.
The poor lads didn’t know what had hit them being faced with two delirious Irish women- if we weren’t talking we were singing and if we weren’t singing we were laughing and if we weren’t laughing we were crying!!! And then when Stevie (the fireman) pulled up his car out front with his two dogs dangling out the back window he didn’t know what he had unleashed when Roisin bounded out to play with them!
By the time the bar was closing up we decided it was time for bed so we crawled upstairs to our bunks but not before a quick call to Louise (our phones finally picked up reception again) although it was a bit late in the day she gave Roisin some valuable tips on how to deal with Anna’s tantrums before the two of us passed out for our final sleep of the journey.
Roma to Brisbane
475km
We’re nearly there now folks but typical of us we had to finish up with a
The first time in four days that we were actually on the road to Brisbane
bang….. our destination was so close that Mike was already getting the teapot ready. We were running on the last of our adrenaline and our heads were a little achy after the night before but we were so close. We had left the Outback now and were driving back into the flood zone. As we passed through Chinchilla Roisin pulled down her window to take a few pics of the damage left by the receding flood waters.
Unfortunately when Roisin went to pull her window up again it made a sad little crashing noise and refused to budge. So as we approached Toowoomba (another badly effected town) we decided it was a good time to pull into MacDonalds and take stock of the situation. However as we exited the drive-thru and Anna tried to pull up her window it made the same sad little crashing noise and before we knew it both windows were broken and we were once again on the phone to Mike sobbing down the line (ok maybe sobbing is the wrong word more like gentle yelling crossed with a crazy tantrum).
Once we had our fill of burgers and we had calmed down a bit we set of again with our natural aircon blowing the heads off us straight onto the first bit of motorway we had seen in days. We don’t know why they use the expression the luck of the Irish because at that point our luck broke for about the 100th
Evil Cloud of Doom Descends
So very cold and wet.....
time as the thunder started and the rain came pouring in the windows, we had been driving for 4 days through 40′ heat and that was the minute Mother Nature decided to let rip, four hours outside of Brisbane. We got some funny looks off passing cars and at one point the downpour got so heavy that we had to pull in for fear of being washed off the road. But eventually we made it back to Windsor and the Shorties were finally reunited.
This has been an especially long post so if you have managed to make it all the way to the end go make yourself a cup of tea and thank your lucky stars that somebody has warned you NOT to ever even dream of driving from one end of Queensland to the other in the broadest ranging devastating flooding the province has ever seen because sometimes its just easier to do what everyone else says and get on a plane!
Thank you to all the people of Queensland who we met along the way who were so generous even when they had lost everything they still helped the two lost little Irish girls.
Love and Hugs
The Shorties & Roisin xxx
Shorties Down Under 